Overcoming abuse

It doesn't just have to be a significant other ya know ik when my pup comes close to cuddle it makes me feel better and ik when my friend gave me a hug after break I was surprised and happy so just look for a start before ya jump into the deep end

@tigereyes11 Yes, this. I know male friendships can sometimes overlook the emotional component when being friends but it is a very important component. I am not a guy obviously but the person who taught me how to give long hugs (I was very uncomfortable with those before), was a close friend of mine. And it is an amazing feeling now.

Yeah I remember before that I kind of felt alienated from my friend group but that year was the year those friends became my best friends

@snake I barely even got short hugs as a kid. It made me feel physically restricted. Caught. Threatened. My parents never gave long hugs either.. and only gave short ones when bad things happened (when my most beloved grandfather died). Now I do realize hugs can be just a way to bond with someone you like. Be it romantically or platonically. I now very much appreciate hugs.

I never got those from anyone besides my mom but she broke my trust not long ago. I want to believe she loves me but after screaming "I don't love you. Go away." I can't bring myself to believe anything anymore.

Parents sometimes say things when they feel like they don't matter I remember one time my mom asked me if I would be upset if she left and ik that she didn't really mean it she was just tired and it didn't seem like things would get better but eventually they did so you should think about when she said that and the things that were happening around her

My mother called me "whore" for the first time when I was nine and did say she wished she listening to my father (who proposed aborting me). But she does love me. Her temper is just shit. She used to hit me often due to this, too. We have actually hugged a lot more after I "learned" how to hug. Tbh.. her parents were even more cruel to her. And said things just as bad if not worse.. I forgave her therefore. And as someone who definitely wants children, set a goal for myself to never.. NEVER hurt my children.