Women approaching men

I think its best to do what makes you comfortable, whether that is taking the lead or initating romance or whether to allow people to come to you. Personally I feel its best to allow the Girl/Woman to come to you as it confirms that my feelings are real and that I am not reading too much into the situation/interactions. I suppose its also, that I am terrified of being rejected or be accused of being a Hentai Baka or some form of weirdo. TLDR: Do what makes you feel best.

Neet, I think you read something in my post that wasn't there. Nowhere did I say that it was a problem for someone to want to be a housewife. That's totally fine. It's the EXPECTATION that anyone, be it male or female, have to fit into these set roles. That's the problem. All I asked for was balance; which is unattainable unless more women start taking more active roles. I'm not saying ALL women. I'm saying women that can, and have the drive to, shouldn't be boxing themselves in because they think it's expected of them and we, as a society, need to stop treating it like that's the "best" arrangement. Also, I take issue with the idea that the "breadwinner" and "homemaker" relationship has always worked well. It's often proven to be an excuse for one party or the other to give less than their all because they don't realize that they need to be able to pick up the slack for the other at any given moment when needed. It's like doubles tennis. You won't get very far if you only know how to hit backhand and play on the left side of the court. You talk about relationships falling apart, but I've seen just as many fall apart that were doing things the "traditional" way as I have with both parties working. I direct this just as much at men as I do women. I believe it's wrong to expect your spouse to do everything at home, just as much as I think it's wrong to expect them to do everything outside the home too. That just leads to one party or the other feeling like they're being taken advantage of. You can have one focused MORE on work, and one focused MORE on the home, but you never know when some catastrophe will occur that will force you to have to fill at least some of the other's role. Saying you want someone to magically whisk you away and solve all your problems without having to make even the tiniest self-sacrifice is the mindset of an infant. That was my point.

Well, I guess I've gotten really used to making a move first. But sometimes, it just doesn't work in my favor simply because I am a guy and will usually look like a creep to the girl. I'm not the most knowledgeable person in the world, but I think sometimes it would just feel better to have the girl approach us. But unfortunately, it doesn't work like that too often.

shawnji, practically no one 'expects' anyone to be a housewife anymore in this part of the world. It's redundant to complain about a none issue like that so I assumed you were complaining about women taking up the role itself. After all you said "I want a partner; not a sponge.". There is no "EXPECTATION" and there is no "problem". You're seeing something that isn't there just like you said yourself. When was the last time you've ever seen someone demand that a girl be a housewife? Have you ever seen anyone demand it or expect it here? How is society expecting this of women? Most guys I've met wouldn't date a girl who doesn't have a job. I doubt you'd be able to find a single girl that was ever dumped for having a job. There are however plenty of people these days telling women that being a housewife is wrong and that they should get a job and focus on careers. Even if you're not pushing 'everyone' into these new roles you're still pushing people into them all the same. Also I've already admitted traditional relationships aren't piratical in the face of the current economic situation we find ourselves in. I believe traditional relationships are ideal but not at all piratical in today's word. You'd have to be very wealthy and successful person to be able to support a family on a single income, which does not apply to most people. Just as almost all of my coworkers live with their parents because they can't afford not to without a second job. What I'm saying is for better or worse we're suck with the current two income system like it or not. I'd also agree with you that problems can arise at any time, so having different skills to fall back on is always a good thing. That said. You're saying you never said it was a problem for someone to want to be a housewife, Yet you also say things like: "I still hear, "I just want to be treated like a princess and have someone take care of me," way too often and it literally turns my stomach.", which was in relation to the matter of "breadwinner" vs someone who "minds the home.".

Let's clarify a few things. When someone is saying they want to be "taken care of" and "treated like a princess," that is different from wanting to be a housewife. That's being a spoiled child and a sponge; not a housewife. The second thing is that I find your statement about the expectation to fit into societal roles no longer existing to be patently ridiculous. It may not be overtly stated in the manner of, "Me man! You woman! You stay home! Me work!" but it is still there in very subtle ways throughout our media and culture. It doesn't matter if both partners are actually working. The point is that many of them don't want it that way; that their expectations don't match up with their reality, and that leads to dissapointment and failed relationships. That's the problem. I myself grew up in a household where my father pushed that I, as a man, needed to be the one in-charge. That I was supposed to earn a living and support my wife completely. I needed to avoid showing emotions because I was a boy. Women should be able to stay home and focus on the children and home. His ideas have gradually changed over the years, but the impressions left on me in my youth caused me no end of trouble and heartbreak when I tried to live up to that and failed. So, don't try and tell me these gender-based expectations don't still exist in our society, because they most assuredly do. I have seen it at work in my own life, and in the lives of those around me. I've known too many friends who came out and were disowned or abandoned by friends and family. That is a real, palpable pressure to fit into these standard roles that society has etched out for us. If you can't see that these gender-biased ideas still exist and impact people, then I honestly don't know what to say to you. We'll likely just have to agree to disagree. As for this statement: "Even if you're not pushing 'everyone' into these new roles you're still pushing people into them all the same." Since when has pushing people who are holding themselves back when they actually want to do the thing you're pushing them to do been a bad thing? That's called "encouragement," last I checked.

Well.I've approached,my guy freinds,only very recently have i been able to be a bit more outgoing,with asking men out T-T and had enough courage,and balls to as them on some freind dates,only 1 has worked out,and it was fun! Do not give up on us girls,all the way

Honestly, I think if you like someone then you should just approach them - forget all concepts of what gender should do what and just approach them. Whether you're a guy or a girl and you want to be with the person you're interested in then you should make an effort rather than waiting for the other person to do something that may never, ever happen. I feel this happens a lot but people think to themselves "maybe they'll approach me and we can go from there" and while that might happen, there's a big chance that it won't. That's why I think that anyone who likes someone should ALWAYS take the initiative at all times even if you're shy, you need to get out of your comfort zone if you want that person you really like. If you want something, you have to work for it right?

Laugh able. Women in genre don't approach men any less the guy is really hot. So for me and millions of others out there this is a laugh able subject.

Yeah I hear ya. I was on POF.com and messaged about 47 different girls and didn't get a single reply. I just deleted my profile today. Going to delete this one soon as well. Since I don't have a GF I feel as though my life is meaningless. And yeah I heard the "don't give up" speech and "if you think negative you will never get anyone". But there are more males then females in this world and biology has also said so lol. So one way or another a lot of males will be leftovers. I'm probably one of them. That's why I quit my job, I was basically working and stressing for no reason. Maybe cocane or death may help me lol.