Is it worse to be too easy/attainable or too picky/unattainable?

It doesn't sound terrible Teacup. If you really don't like someone that way then you don't. Better to let them know early so that they can find a good match they can be happy with. And hopefully you can as well~

I gave the doing the first thing you saw a go. I mean I got self control of my libido and I never felt like I was ever so desperate for it that I really would do anything. I wanted to intentionally make a mistake, just to tick it off on the things to do in life check list. It didn't turn out well. Now I got this dumb ugly girl super mad at me for finding her so irritating mid coitus that I just left her. And as a typically salty woman does, spread rumours about me. And even made allegations. The truth didn't matter, only the truth that was the most dramatic. Not doing that again. But I guess I took something away from it. If I ever find a woman whose beauty brings me at awe. I will hold her precious to me even after our time together ended. And yes this includes beauty on the inside. I CANNOT stand the stuck up high maintenance bitches. In a relationship, it is all about maturity and compromise and equality. I dunno how some men can stand children in woman form. Even if they are pretty. The beauty of the form loses meaning if I can't stand to stay near enough to appreciate.

I'd say it's just a little worse to be too picky just because if you give someone a chance and don't like it you can turn them down later if it doesn't work out and keep stepping. But not giving someone a chance is just end all, be all, poof! The end. And I've seen a lot more guys and girls who were sad and lonely because they only date models with perfect personalities who have to be a complete match. I mean I get having standards but being able to let someone be human and have flaws matters too.

I am very picky when it comes to actual relationships. Sure, I'll go on a date with someone (so I do give many people a chance) but that doesn't mean much to me. I could go on a couple dates with a person and then easily break it off. Feelings get hurt that's true but that's to be expected if you participate in the madness of dating. I only get emotionally invested after a couple months after knowing a person. And that only if I feel connected to the person. People who easily fall in love fall out of it just as easily so I'm sceptical about emotionally easy people. As for being sexually easy I honestly don't really care. Though I'd let them get checked on STDs. Nothing personal.. Actually yes, it is.

(Mostly responding to veru) When I say not to be too picky, I don't mean dating just anyone. I just mean not trying to find someone that fits your perfect ideal. For example, I would love a redheaded twintail about 5ft tall green eyes 100lbs B cup that has above average intelligence, is artsy, extremely athletic, high sex drive, loves to cuddle me and watch anime. But I'm not going to go around snubbing every girl that comes along that doesn't fit that mystical ideal. But I'm also not going to date every single girl that comes along either. People confuse being picky or not, with having high standards or not. I disagree, those are 2 different things. What I mean about not being picky is just considering dating someone outside your usual preferences. Someone a little younger or older, a little fatter or skinnier, someone who may like a few things you don't, whatever. But only if you really want to, if you find something about them attractive. Veru talks about other preferences being more important than attraction (being handsome). Everyone loves being all high and mighty with claiming looks don't matter etc. I agree everything is important, not just looks. But why would you want to date someone you aren't attracted enough to, to want to fuck them? The basic start of wanting to be with someone is the physical desire to mate with them, then you get to know them and build on that and if you have enough in common and like everything else about them, you decide to have a relationship. Knowing someone better can increase the desire to be intimate with them, but if there is no desire in the first place than why bother? Isn't that just friendship? I have sexual preferences because I have an inbuilt genetic tendency to only be sexually attracted to feminine characteristics and female pheromones. A guy could be awesome and I would love to be friends with him but I don't have a relationship with him because I don't want to fuck him.

Maybe I'm wired differently but looks aren't what turn me on to a person. I'm not going to deny that when I see someone attractive I blatantly disregard their looks but I can say that I am rarely AROUSED by someone's looks. I'm more turned on by how intelligent someone is or by their personality. I didn't know those preferences put me on such a high horse. I'll keep that in mind the next time I judge someone on whether or not I would date them or fuck them.

Well, guys and girls are wired differently. That's just my perspective. Personality traits can increase my desire for someone or increase arousal when I'm intimate with them, but I have to have some sort of base physical desire there in the first place (really not that hard, I'm physically attracted to a wide range.) I wasn't trying to say you were on a high horse. The particular statement I think you are referring to is aimed more at people in general who like to say that looks don't matter. I've had relationships with a wide range of (physical looks) girls. My last gf was almost 300lbs and had an H cup, but it didn't matter that much.

I agree with Veru. It is definitely possible to go from aquaintances to friendship to attraction to dating. You might get to know a person and not find them attractive at all but over time while getting to know them better you find traits that not only outweigh their "lack" in looks but make you see them as more attractive physically. It's a psychological thing. Everyone appreciates an attractive partner but there are things that are more important. And some people value looks less than others do. I dare to say the more evolved ones.