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Parents abuses

mamani_nnnn
So anyone ever feels like being bullied from parents? So I've suffered because of my parents for long times. They ripped off my self-esteem a lots. They don't trust my abilities, never. If I intend to do something, they won't cheers me nor believe that I can succeed it. If I'm failed it they'll insulted me, and if I'm succeed they'll says things like 'Oh well, We think you couldn't succeed it.' or so, no praised. And when I didn't succeeded in what they want, they immediately assumed that I'm stupid or something, even though I'm good at other things. Also They always says that I can't live or stand on my own. But the truth is I can, But without them they won't lets me choose my own choices. I'm living with them, but we're rarely talking, I tried to avoid them as possible because everytimes we talked they'll start mentioned about my study, future or so. And we'll ended up with a fight. Huhh I don't know what I should do next. Hmmmm (;・∀・)
vampire_neko
I don't know them so I couldn't say for sure, but it sounds like maybe they are just upset at their own failures and just take it out on you, but there could be other reasons. Maybe they want you to do certain things to compensate for what they wanted to do. But you have to live how you want and not how they want. If they can't deal with your feelings and desires in a healthy way without putting you down than maybe you should look at ways you can eventually move out and do things on your own.
mamani_nnnn
I'm planning on moving out when graduated tho. But it's like they won't leave me alone because I'm the only child that living with them now, all of my brothers refused to moving in with them because they've had enough of theis shits. One of my brother even got OCD.
siruboo
Mar 13, 16 at 3:56am
some people will tear you apart doesnt matter if there family
mamani_nnnn
I don't know if they really have a good will for me. But all of these are wrong. And I'm suffered very much. I hate my culture that the youngs must obey the olders. Whenever I try to told them about this they won't listen. So I'm reached the point that I'm almost don't care about them anymore.
fancycosplayer6
If you want to move, you should be consider looking a job. For beginners, on having your own place. Your best option is to rent an apartment. So, you need to save money for a while to cover a few months. ^u^
fancycosplayer6
Also, there are two types of parent abuse. Mental or physical. I think you might be having mental abuse. :/ However, I study Asian culture on TheGreatWall from YouTube. It's sounds like you have the strict parents. ;:3
mamani_nnnn
I still have to relying on them on my college pays. Ugh I couldn't get a part-time job because I've class esfive days a week and straight from morning to afternoon. Nah it's like children's succees are accessories for them here. Parents like to show off their childs to another. I got comparing with others kids a lot. There go again, my self-esteem.
tatsuro_yanagi
Just believe what you believe then all you have to do is do what you wanna do. It is your life :) You can do anything you want.
hadesus
Mar 13, 16 at 4:53am
There is few way to educate a child. Hatred and will to surpass obstacles is one of those. My parents are like that too, and well, know that i'm like, equal in a manner (I've worked at a kindergarten, so i know what it is to educate childs, at least, when they are little, but that don't really matter.). Being harsh to a child sometimes make them being willingfull to become way more adult, more confident in themselve and serious in resolving their problems. The truth is, in a matter, they don't want for you the same life train they are on, but a better train if you get my idea. If your parents are like mine, every time they scold you for not perfectly succeed at something, one of them still give you his own way of thinking on how to succeed. Sometimes kindfull, but most of the other, like if you were to stupid at it(Yeah, this way of educating is harsh and meanful.) Well the second think that could happen. Is that the child will take the harshness like a desire from his parents/tutor to destroy him and don't like him. It result of a kid that is less confident in his own capabilities, and that will care more about others than him because he will be attuned to be mental abused. In fact, he will be introverted, but look for others need and caring much for them than for himself. In either way, your parents probably still loving you, and do this for your own devellopement. It's looks like a twisted way of educating child. But back before the year 199X, most of the child were educated like this. The thing about all your brothers beggining to leave, back then being in a family for too long was not particurarly being seen like a good thing. Your parents are maybe taking it so "old-school" that they think the same way. If you want an example to understand it, in anime like Naruto (I take a exemple that is wlear for most of all, if you dont have the naruto reference, and still dont understand, i'll get another exemple for ya^^). Hinata Hyuga is scolded from the start and becomme like introverted. With time, she understand why she was, and surpass her shyness to become more adult. In the other hand, Neji get the same treatment, and become so willingful to surpass the family that he finally succeed. When i think about it, most of childs i were educating doesn't seems to comprehend how this works. But when you ask them "Why do you think i scolded you for?", the answer is always the same in the end. "Cause You were caring for me and don't want me to get hurt.". It's more easy and safe to scold a child when it don't hurt him, if he doesn't learn before being confronted to the specific problem in real life, it could be harsher for him, or painful. Well, I won't advice you on how to act with your parents(Maybe the teaching methods are the same, but every parent is different on how they react at words..), but you need care. SOoo, hang in there! You can make it, don't let it makes you down more than you are, good luck to you no matter what!
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