Talking to People

I have a massive problem with talking to new people in RL (I don't have that problem when talking to people I know for a longer time); Can't show my feelings well, don't know how to do smalltalk, weirdly staring around and I have absolutly no idea what to talk about. So basically I'm waaay to awkward xD. There is nothing that bothers me when I'm talking over DC or TS3, and I can speak free from my soul. It feels nearly impossible to meet new people and I feel like I need just someone to talk with. Though I do have friends, but we aren't really close and I don't want to shoo them away. So in shorter: Dose someone here just wanna talk a little? Or has some advice how to be open more to people? Just less awkward would be a huuge step tho xD. I would really appreciate that!

Bringing up current events, the weather, or asking how they're doing (even just making a joke) is usually an easy start to small talk. Then you just follow up on any other info they might give you. You're basically just trying to guess what interests the individual might have and work with that. Maybe you two like the same music, movies, anime, tv shows, etc. As long as you're not the only one trying to keep the conversation going then you should be good. Make sure you give the other person a reason to talk or they'll get bored and stop engaging in the conversation.

I am always down for a good convo herrweizen, do you have a toastmasters international near you? I have had to speak to large groups before and toast masters helped a lot

@avenger_senpai This is some really good advice! I will definitly try this out, but before that I have to get my courage up to talk to people. That should be possible though :) Thank you very much! Totally gonna keep that in mind and trying to get used to that :D I forgot to mention, it mostly feels like I'm the one who wants to keep the conversation going. Always thought I might just be plain boring, which I honestly can't really argue against xD. But maybe another part was, that I just couldn't keep the other party involved. Really, thank you very, very much!!

@hellion1 Never heared of toastmaster before (the name is amazing tho) and a quick google search showed me that I could really benefit from that! There is one in Cologne, which isn't that far away from my current home. Really thinking about visiting it. Thank you for the advice! Did you have to talk to a larger group because of your job? Doesn't happen too often that someone has to do that I think. :D And when they could help you. What do you think helped you the most there? Would be great to know!

I was a mute for 4 years in elementary/middle school so I can relate when you said that you just awkwardly stand around. It seems you have a very logical personality, and social interactions seem to require the opposite kind of intelligence. Are you trying to start conversations with people at work? Maybe you can find one frustration that your co-worker is having at the job and make a joke about it where you both can laugh. In my case, there is a woman at my work where we had made a social connection talking about sparkling water. Have a news app on your phone with local news so you always have something interesting to talk about in your back pocket. Remember, it has to be interesting. Also, most importantly, don't overstay your welcome. If they are looking away from you the most when you are talking, it's time to dip because they are trying to get something done. There are also times where you said the interesting thing you want to say, they have said an interesting thing they want to say, and both of you are empty. To get out of those situations you can say, "Alright, well I'm going to just _____" or just fuggin walk away like I do. You really have to just walk away if somebody else buts in on the conversation and you need to leave. No shame in just bouncing.

Not related to the topic but I've noticed that people sometimes find it difficult to converse normally with specific individuals. Probably it's got something to do with the aura they radiate or smth. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯