What are you afraid of?

The concept of being alive and existence terrifies me to no end. I have multiple existential crises a day because I keep pondering what it means to exist and be alive. Regular generic fears consist of heights and absolute darkness.

@Haruu: Considering I live a block away from the hospital, which is right next door to the only grocery store on my side of town, I can relate. @Tsunepaper: Oh, existentialism. Yeah, I contemplate on that stuff all the time, and to be honest, I don't really understand why it generates fear in people. I exist? Kewl. Time to keep existing. I don't exist? That's a relief. My life has meaning? Eh, alright. I have no real way of knowing what that is, so I'll just try to create harmony in the lives of those who interact with me. My life doesn't have meaning? Oh good, I get to make up my own. Whether there's meaning in existence and life or not, the stuff our bodies are made of is literally as old as time, and matter is finite in this universe. So it's all worth something. And as far as we know, the weirdest thing we've discovered in this universe is us and the other critters that live here. Hell, even if being sensitized to spirits grants me at least some concept of what lies in the layers of reality beyond us, I still don't pretend to have the answers, and I don't suspect that I ever will. So uh... Don't try to think too hard about it. We're only 3rd dimensional entities on the cognitive level, after all. It's impossible for us to ascertain all the answers. So, wherever you place your time, love, and attention, that's where the value in life is. And Value > Meaning in my humble opinion. Also, not trying to say you are silly for having such fears, nor am I pretending to be right. It's just the way I view existence. And I hope something in there is at least cathartic. We're all in it together, after all.

@Chocopyro I think it tends to be a bit more complicated in my mind... I'm not very good at explaining things in general. I always find myself struggling to use the right words. Still though I did appreciate your response, thank you for that. I am not sure if it is my meaning or value that gives me fear, I think it is just the fact I exist as a person period that really terrifies me. I do wonder about certain things in regard to what it means to exist and such, I just don't know how to explain it perfectly. I can't really explain what it is I think about for existence and what about my own existence is terrifying. In a way it is something I do not know the words for.

Higher concepts like existence are an extremely abstract concepts to begin with. I certainly can't do it justice. Throw emotions into the mix, which are hard to coherently and concisely explain in general (Too many nuances muddy the waters), and I don't know if the greatest of wordsmiths could put together what you're feeling. English is a broken language after all. Sometimes parables, allegories, and metaphors aren't even enough. If ever you do want to take a crack at it, feel free to message me. I can probably at least empathize with some if it.