I wish to die!

I'm dealing with a ton of misery too, been that way most of my life. Haven't had the strength to end it. There is still a tiny bit of hope in me that things will be ok one day....maybe.....one day...

Suicide is a touchy subjevt for me. You've been warned. Suicide is a cowards way out. No matter what, if you live long enough and focus on cutting out the negative you'll get to a spot you're satisfied with, even if its not the ideal you had as a child. Bottling shit up and pretending to be someone youre not takes a lot of energy and is extremely draining. You need to start being honest with yourself and then begin to show the world who that is, and then brush aside the ones that bitch and moan. For YEARS only 3 people knew I was really into anime. And anime and gaming are my main form of entertainment. Theres a lot of simple facts that I've hidden that are probably insignificant to a shit load of people. Joining MO was one of my first steps and I've been able to find a couple people that I've become pretty close with that encourage me to press on. You should start by finding a peaceful place to reflect on who you want to be and start making the changes to achieve that, and work towards it little by little, step by step. Or you could be a little pussy bitch that hangs himself or slashes his wrists, not understanding the full effects of what hes putting everyone he's known, even breifly. Or the people on here that will forever wonder what really happened when Dazai stopped posting. Dont be a cowardly, pansy jackass. Step up and seize control of your life. You're able to do it! If you faked being someone so long, fake being someone you like until you actually buy in. Or again, be a cowardly stupid fuck. Your choice

Frankly a good album I like that dealt with suicide was Nightmare by Avenged Sevenfold. They changed a lot of lyrics to reflect the Rev, their drummer that had just killed himself that was their childhood friend. If you care to see some the emotional roller coaster on those you'll leave behind.

http://youtu.be/TXbbkV3LQJc There. I've even made it easy for you to listen to. For anyone whos willing

At this stage I don’t know if I want to die or if I’m just tired of life. I go through the same agonizing crap everyday. I’ve no one to talk to irl, only those who are here.