should the guy make the first move

It ultimately doesn't matter who makes the first move. If you like someone then you bloody well tell them! The issue here is that guys are expected to kick things off while girls just wait around looking pretty but there's two flaws with that social construct - one: a lot of guys don't know how to approach that kind of situation and often choke or don't bother because of that. Two: a lot of girls constantly wait for the guy they like to come and talk to them as if it's their duty they must fulfill to them but yet often get frustrated and lose interest just because they didn't do what they wanted them to, thus ignoring them (despite really liking them, yeah makes sense doesn't it?) and moving onto the next guy and doing the exact same thing, hoping they would notice her. I guess it's worked out so far but you can see why this is an issue - implied gender roles that don't serve any practical purpose whatsoever and it's an unhealthy attitude for society to have in something so mundane as relationships. I guess the point I'm trying to make at the end of the day is if you really like someone then let them know you like them! It really is that simple and that goes for both guys AND girls - stop being afraid of rejection and stop expecting people to just notice you and do all the work for you. JUST DO IT!

It might very well defeat the purpose of a dating site, but the reality nowadays is that traditional dating sites are hemorrhaging users as more people turn to hookup oriented swipe apps like Tinder or Bumble - where you can't have much of a profile and communication isn't very encouraged. Even OKCupid recently made changes to be a lot more like Tinder. To me, that all makes MO an even better place. But to each their own.

That i agree with you. I'm not into the hook up scene like Tinder. With platforms like Tinder they pretty much only serve for the purpose of hooking up without the social complications which i'm not criticizing (to each their own) but when its too direct like that you entirely lose out on the communication aspect. Or they are just a status/ego boost. From the male perspective, its difficult to stand out online. It's like stepping in a field of land mines. The whole damsel in distress/knight in shining armour constructs won't get people too far. Progress has been made to abolish gender stereotypes except when it comes to the dating realm no one wants to budge. I think it would do the male population a huge favour if women are encouraged to make the first move or better communicate. At least they can filter out the type of guy they are looking for and don't have to play the waiting game and guys don't have go through the whole guessing game, they will know for a fact whether the interest is mutual or not. I don't think guys should make the first move, confidence is applicable to both genders. If she doesn't have the courage to just simply ask out a guy and uses the male double standard, then that's being hypocritical and might even say that she doesn't value you enough to just drop a line. I think a compromise would be fair, there should be equal communication, maybe at least make it like 90% clear that you want to be asked out, that way the other person knows for a fact the feeling is mutual and will have the confidence to do so. It maybe an unconventional thought but hey the truth hurts, ain't nothing wrong with confident women.

Yes they should. Its the first part in the natural elimination process. Buuut if the stars are lined just right a girl will make a move. If she makes a move treat her like a princess. If she is ugly, fat, or hates anime, build up her ego, gently let her go feeling better than when she first contacted you

Brendan, You're 30? Wow... (I'll leave it at that.)

I used to make the first move until I found out from that experience the men run away and treats me coldly when at first they were nice before my attempt. I learned if a guy really wants to date the girl he will make the first move.

Kameiya, you say that, but I've always had similar results making the first move with girls. Where it would often just weird or creep them out and they'd never talk to me again....

I try to make the first move, but majority of the time I end up making myself look like an idiot. The girl would just laugh take my number and never call me. I know. I know. I should've asked to exchange phone numbers. -__-