Vent

There was a good reason I held off on renewing my Netflix subscription. Something told me the Netflix adaptation of Devil May Cry was going to Trojan Horse some ideology about politics and it 100% did. Now I see why Reuben Langdon got told he couldn't reprise his role of Dante. Yeah, it was because of his personal beliefs not because he did anything genuinely wrong. Either way, I'm glad I slept on this the same as when I slept on the DMC game reboot! I stand by Dante's quote from the first game, "You have the face, but not [the] fire!"

I've never felt more ashamed and useless as a 32 year old guy until now, I really want this electrician plan to be successful

Bad behavior = narcissism? Holding people accountable and promoting fear and hatred have similarities. When someone calls you a narcissist for that, your loved ones would ironically disagree with them, but agree later, but still love you unconditionally calling you a "good person".

How can u care for someone and then get bitched at for doing so but when u get enough of being bitched at u don't fuckin care and get bitched at more then get offended and tell u they would be better off dead just to make u feel like shit for trying to be enough even tho I'll never ever be enough and nothing is ever good enough for anyone

As uncharacteristic of me as always here, but even I can't hide from my nature forever, it seems... relationship troubles were beyond me, I thought. And worse, I hope she doesn't just spawn in and see this shit. But I've been suspicious of her potentially cheating for months now. I shouldn't even have these doubts to begin with, I mean she's allowed to have friends. I just don't like how she acts all cutesy with a specific one. Maybe this is a healthy level of suspicion, maybe not. Either way, I just have no idea how to confront her about it, or talk it out. She's never been the most confident in herself, is a bit selfless, and struggles to say "no". That said, I'm honestly scared as hell of all the things that could go wrong and can't stop thinking about it. I'm afraid of possibly hurting her, I'm afraid of losing her, or making her think of me differently, and I'm afraid of pulling the plug, were it necessary. I just don't have anyone else that I can truly be myself around, and I'm scared to lose that, and I'm scared that if I do, some other dude in the future will just hurt her, and make her believe for the rest of her life that love doesn't exist, or is a bad thing.