When being yourself isn't enough.

Its never not enough. Being yourself is the best thing you can do. Never be fake cause eventually you'll find someone who likes you for you.

The people who are gonna write you off for being how you're comfortable being aren't worth it in the first place. The thing about it is, people actually respect people who stick to their guns and are true to themselves more than they respect people who bow to whatever the prevailing group dynamic happens to be at the time. People can recognize when someone's faking the funk just to impress the group. Here's what I think is lost in the whole "be yourself" narrative, however: Sometimes, "being yourself" isn't going to get you where you want to go. Sometimes "yourself," whatever kind of person "yourself" is, is holding you back. And if that's the case, there's nothing at all wrong with actively endeavouring to self-improve. It *has* to be for you, though.

Anubis - I agree. My best friend growing up had a hard time making friends and did not know why. What he found was his tone of voice comes off very condescending as did his entire family so it seemed natural. They weren't really but it was the modal tone of voice they used a lot as they have a very raw/sarcastic sense of humor. His friends did not care as we just think of him as blunt/crass and he does not sugar coat things. When looked at more objectively his tone of voice and body language as he is a big bald tattooed guy made him more intimidating than he really was. He learned to smile more and relax his hands as they were always in half fists so he looked like he was about to punch someone all the time. Now he is very approachable and he never had problems approaching strangers they were just afraid at first but not as much now lol.

That post about you being overweight, losing the pounds, and then being resentful to the people who began to warm up to you from that point on is poignant for me. I know how that feels; it's not that I was ever picked on. I was the popular guy and I turned away from it and was somewhat shunned for having done so. We never had the same interests, those guys and me; They liked parties, I liked quiet gatherings. They liked MTV, I liked anime :P So I said, "Screw you guys, I'm going home!" But yeah, ironically, I felt I wasn't enough for the crowd I wanted to fit in with; namely, the anime, talented, so called "socially inept" types. Still don't feel really accepted as such, but as long as you accept you, then that's all that matters.