Personality or looks????

oki i really need advice um basicly ive been bullyed in teh past about my weight and i didnt let it get to me till now im unhappy with the way i look i think im fat and ugly ive been single for 4yrs and i think to myself maybe its because of that or maybe not im not sure but im thinking loosing weight but really need peoples own advice what would you do? im think to my self i lose weight would i get a nice cute guy or am i just being stupid .. do guys really go for looks or personanity?

To be honest yes but I'm more of a face person like a girl could have an attractive. Body but if her face does not match is a turn off. But that is more shallowness in my part true love is in the beholder but looks help too. But the problem with basing love on just looks does not lead to happiness because every rose has its thorns.

in terms of looks i will offer the same advice i give to everyone else with that problem. strive for the change ONLY if it is something you PERSONALLY want and not because it's what you think others want. what people tend to forget or not now is that stress is actually a cause of weight gain, which would be detrimental to your efforts. and when you do want to lose weight, do it with something fun where the main point isn't to lose weight. i started with american foot ball, then moved to dancing. and now i'm 330 with a large amount of that weight being muscle or bone mass. in terms of your actual question, for every guy it's different. me personally i would say that i actually prefer to build upon experiences i've shared with someone. personality can change with time, looks can change in an instant. but memories and experiences.... those can't change because you experienced them and you felt those feelings at that time..... sorry for rambling....

i am not going to lie animegirl. most guys first respond to looks. Its natural human instinct. Human attraction. Getting to know the person usually comes after Weight is a pain in the ass, ive been struggling with the same thing. Luckily im absurdly tall so it balances it a bit, but still. Confidence is also important

If they don't like you for you. Then who cares. You will never know who someone is unless you let go of who you want them to be.

Your personality should matter the most! If a guy judges you based on your looks, then he's not worth your time! When you find the right guy, he'll love you for you!

"strive for the change ONLY if it is something you PERSONALLY want" - Key. Here's the bottom line on weight, it comes with all sorts of medical issues. If I lost some weight, I would be more comfortable at my job where I stand 40 hours a week. If you're young and over weight, your risk of diabetes goes way up. Etc, Etc. You can find your soul mate heavy or not. But why die early on him because of something you can control? I need to loose weight too and know how hard it is to do. But if I start having knee problems because I'm overweight, I have no one to blame but myself. As to finding a guy, I am with Kai Katsuragi, "If a guy judges you based on your looks, then he's not worth your time!"

I'm going with what Kai said, but if your weight really bothers you, try harder to find new solutions to loosing weight or feeling comfortable in your body. Buy new appropriate clothes or if you do want to loose the weight start by drinking lots of water (sometimes when you're feeling hungry you're really just thirsty) and walking outside for 30 minutes. You should be more concerned with your health than looks, and personally exercise really does help me with my depression and self esteem, so try getting out more, you'll feel better.

I"m more concerned about what is going on upstairs than with an appearance that will fast fade in 20 years. :) Everyone has different tastes, but to deny that physical attraction doesn't play a small role in a relationship is naive. Regardless of your own perception of yourself, there are people out there that won't see it the same way you do. Sure finding them is hard, but if it was easy then would it really be worth the effort? You cherish them all the more for seeing the positive in you that even you couldn't see. That makes for a successful relationship. :)

Zappa you are a wise wise man. I agree, personality is 10x more important then appearance but thats not how alot of the world sees it sadly : (