Taking a hint

@BurningHalo (Thanks lol) Well of course I wouldn't want them in my life lol, if you're not interested in me whether that's friendship or romantically then I won't pursue you at all anymore, the moment I pick up on those hints I'm walking. But it's more that I'm saying that if someone is being short with you that you probably shouldn't assume anything unless they actually do it consistently, along with other hints that make it seem like they're avoiding you. It's more that asking "Are you not interested in talking to me?" while the person might be genuinely busy or just tired will make you seem needy to them and it might make them dislike you or at least make them uncomfortable, it's just not a good way to go.

I get that. I'm not saying you have to call them out like they're being wrong or talk the first time they don't say two sentences to ya. But if it is a consistent behavior among other things and it is bothering you then mentioning it is better than saying nothing. I've had friends tell me that I seem to be talking to them less and we went on to have great conversations. It's all in how you say it. Other person might even feel missed and want to talk more. Just the same yeah...they could find you needy and neurotic and just stop talking but hey. IF you just let things fizzle they might just stop altogether as well. I prefer being direct myself is all. And I prefer when others are direct with me

@Baithoven I don't think you come off as needy if you ask someone whether they are interested in talking or not. You could always word it differently too. I'm basically just saying that there's never always just one conclusion as to why someone is not talking as much or replying with short answers and that you should be careful of this.

@BurningHalo To add to this, it depends on how busy people are and, honestly, how much free time they have to spin their gears. You never want to assume someone's busy when they're not, and vice versa. I used to be the kind of guy who could go weeks, maybe even months without speaking to a soul. Because I had something (multiple things) I wanted to do, and I chipped away at those things like a maniac. I feel bad, honestly, for letting some friendships fall by the wayside a bit. And then say you feel like you've accomplished all you can up to a certain point? Such that you don't necessarily have to work like a maniac anymore? All of a sudden you have a lot of time to think about things you willingly ignored before. And if you're someone like me whose head is spinning 24/7 with thoughts, you find yourself with too much free time. Take it from me, the guy who used to spend 99% of time leaving everyone unread, to becoming that guy who wishes people were more responsive because he's bored out of his fucking gourd and has the propensity to type a mile and a minute in pure word vomit. Having been on both sides of the fence, sometimes people just want to talk to relieve boredom. TL;DR, I feel the line between neurotic chat-monitoring and ignoring literally everybody is blurrier than people think.

@BurningHalo Personally I'm more likely to pull back for a while and see what happens or if I really have to ask something like that then I'd ask it more in a way like "Hey, what's up?" or at least something that sounds more loving than "Are you uninterested in talking to me?" because that comes off as kinda negative, like you're worried that you're not worthy of someone else's attention or something. But yeah, someone being a little distant or short by itself is not necessarily a good indicator of their interest in you, but like I said if they show other behaviours like not wanting to hang out or making plans to hang out but then blowing you off last minute or being wishy washy/flaky then they probably aren't very interested, especially if it's a woman since guys tend to be more direct.

One rule I usually go by when talking to people it's whether the conversation feels natural. Relationships require you to be able to produce chemistry between the two individuals involved, if one side is trying super hard and gets no reaction the energy would be better spent elsewhere. Now I know there's millions of reasons for not answering someone or answering in a dry manner, being the most important one introversion or shyness, let's be real though, everyone can pull of 15 seconds out of 14 or so activity hours to reply a simple "I'm not in the mood but will get in touch later" instead of answering to hobbies "I like doing stuff" Another factor is whether someone asks you questions back, like... It's basic communication to answer and ask back, if I ask about music tastes I obviously would like an opportunity to talk about mine, I had a woman once on a date answer me "I didn't asked for your opinion" when I answered without her asking me back. Since then I have conflicting thoughts on this. There's no 100% answer, trust your guts, if you feel like you're begging someone for a simple hi, just revalue your self worth and keep walking!!

I did have a girl who would reply with one word answers but eventually she opened up. Turned out she was just super shy. It's kinda hard to put examples down since every situation is different but you need to have a detached view. Be able to look at it and try to see where they are coming from. I've had pretty bad experiences but that isn't going to happen with everyone. I think a good test is to not say anything for a while and see if they respond on their own. If they might be shy or have low self esteem then send something after a few days to see how they respond. If they are a genuinely busy person and you can't deal with that then you need to be honest without yourself about letting them go.

@Maid I think it does, but that has more to do with the wording than anything else. And that's what I'm saying too, just giving short replies by itself is not necessarily a good indicator because there can be many reasons for that but I also list a bunch of other signs that you could look for and if several of them check out then they're probably not that interested.

If I'm the one asking all the getting to know you questions and I don't receive any in return. . .well, that's a hint to me. I take it as "Yeahhh. . .I'm really not that interested in getting to know you. Sorry."