Reasons to Live

@PM I think the format of tinder would probably work in someone like @Lee. I'm just assuming, he wants companionship, but lacks whatever element it takes to spark it. Eliminating the guessing period of "Am I at least attractive to them?" will solve his first problem. Then you'll face a new problem: Learning to not suck at relationships. When someone figures this out tell me lol.

There are moving forms of meditation. Yoga and qigong have different disciplines. You could also try searching "meditation for add" I bet there are tons of sources. The thing I'm trying to get at is you just gotta go on living and keep trying things. These days I've been more accepting of myself as I've read changes can happen from acceptance despite how paradoxical that sounds. There is a lot out there. You don't have to be anything just be what you want. You'll find that if you keep going. You might benefit from therapy to change your inner dialogue. That seems to be messing you up a lot. Try looking up "positive inner dialogue" and also "shadow work" they won't happen right away but they are skills you can learn. I'm just throwing a few ideas though there is always something you can try.

Lee, Shut up and stop being a self defeatist. That is all. (I know, WAY easier said than done.)

I stg nobody I'm around likes me ever, it's hard to validate yourself when there's nobody supporting you

You have to be content with the person that you are. Morally, physically, mentally. Sometimes it’s a matter of taking another look at yourself and either realizing your self worth or putting in the hard work to cultivate a new version of yourself that you can truly respect. Until you can do that, a significant other is out of the question, and I think that finding someone special is often the result of putting in the work to become a better or more attractive/productive person rather than vice-versa.

The only reason I'm still alive is because I couldn't imagine my mother losing another daughter.....and it's bad enough that she has cancer

Imma just leave this here. Do with it what you will