Vent

Oh, I've had my fair share of moments saying or doing the wrong thing around my kids, but that's on another level. Really, it's not the words that are the issue so much as how things are said. I don't cuss at my kids(Been guilty of losing my cool and not being so good with my words more so in a situational manner rather than directed at them, but I as the adult also realize they only see dada losing his cool at them... It's not right and I know this.), but I'm trying to work on my tone. Tone speaks volumes when you don't yet understand the meaning of words. That kind of aggression sends the message that they're an inconvenience or nuisance and it tends to make a kid feel like they can't trust their own parents.

As you said, you're not actively saying things negatively about them. You aren't calling them degrading names and laughing about it with your fellow coworkers. I had to stop myself from saying something to that woman on the spot. However someone that twisted probably was sexually abused as a child and is probably too much of a nut job to realize the horrible things they're saying about their kids to strangers.

@yaasshat - It's considered mental/emotional abuse and could still warrant a report. Yeah what good would it do since its not physical, it might not go anywhere, etc. etc. And they will want to talk to you and you have to give your name. But even so, at least sending someone to call them out on the behavior might curb it. Sounds like the 'parents' need some counciling.

Oh, I know it's emotional abuse @verucassault , I went through enough of the same crap myself. I suppose it just feels like it'd stir up shit instead of fix. Having kids myself, it's just a bunch of drama I'd rather avoid and I'm aware that sounds cruel/uncaring to the other kids situation. I have a feeling that'll soon change, because I can not stand to hear that kind of shit and knowing the kids have no choice... It's two parents or what I assume are both of their parents and they're both complete dicks to their kids. Trust me, I absolutely want to at bare minimum confront them personally to at least advocate for their kids... It's a dumb situation that seems like it'd have a simple fix, but having a family myself definitely complicates the approach.

I agree with you, Yass. It's a difficult situation. One of my neighbors a couple years ago had their toddler run up the street unsupervised while both parents were at work. I didn't have a way to contact them and it was a FedEx driver who found the child and was going door to door asking whose kid they were. I helped the driver get the kid back to their house agreeing we'd lock the door to keep him from running out again. I tried waiting for someone to come home, but the hours flew by and I myself had somewhere to be. Ultimately I had no choice, but to notify the police. When the police arrived the dad finally showed up because he had a home security device that triggered intruders had been in the home. I and the father didn't share words until sometime after where he confessed that wasn't the first time something like that had happened and he had even went to prison once before for child neglect. He 'politely' asked I never do that again to him, but I told him flat out that (A.) I didn't have his number. And (B.) It was the FedEx driver that requested the police be called because he found the guy's son butt naked in the middle of the road playing by himself.

Better that you piss someone off than someone die. Might be the code of a forgotten social worker, maybe.

Worse part was the man was more worried someone broke into his house to steal his firearms than the well being of his 3 year old. Shows where people's priorities are. And of course it's not lost on me the guy probably leaves his guns in an accessible place that one day, someday, is going to bight that man in the ass. Breaks my heart for the kid if it happens, however I feel it in my bones that tragedy isn't off the table. But people don't listen to reason and of course it's never their responsibility.

So I recall, @verucassault . I think I'm more concerned with the fact that it's not exactly hard to hide or deny verbal abuse, especially when you're talking about against toddlers who obviously can't quite voice concerns. But, I get it, there could be worse crap unseen and that could be the wake up call they need. Me and my fiance are on the same page... Would recording some of the stuff said be a thing that could be used as evidence? I suppose that's defined by the state.

It shouldn't happen but it does. Childcare is too fn expensive. It needs to be something that's completely subsidized until kids are school age. I'm sure there are arguments against it but as someone who could have been in social work [maybe] I think the pros probably have it.