Dating Someone with a Fetish

I know there are people out there who have werid fetish. Though there might be people out here who have fetish how would you tell someone that you have a fetish and don't want to give off as a creep or a pervert or any of the sort. You want them to understand you and not have them looked at you wrong despite what fetish you. How do you tell your GF or BF that you have a fetish? Do you wait for the right time or something else? I'm not sure, anyone have any advice on this?

Mm. I've had some problems with this myself. I dated a guy who had one really big fetish and I was happy to indulge him but it got to where that was all he talked about. All the time. He became obsessed with this one thing and now years later, he still finds ways to contact me and beg me for time and attention. Obviously, don't do that. You don't want to overwhelm your partner with anything. On the flip side, I dated a guy who was really vanilla by my standards and even though our relationship was more or less happy, I was feeling unfulfilled in the sex department. If you're a very sexual person going into a relationship, I would wait until the topic of sex comes up a few times and then tell them that you have tastes that might not be considered vanilla. If they want to know, give them your "sex list". Literally a list of things that turn you on, things that you might be curious about, and things that you would absolutely never do. From there, you can discuss how important certain fetishes are to your sex life. For example, I could never be with a guy who doesn't enjoy "fetish x" but if they're not into "fetish y", then that's alright.

Pretty hard to find anyone in the anime community that doesn't have one. That said it's probably something that's better to get out there sooner rather than latter, as you wouldn't want to waste time with someone who's gonna dump you as soon as you tell them what you're into anyway or who simply wouldn't want to take part in it.

It's good to wait a bit. Don't just spring it on them but I'm with neet on this. Better to say so sooner if you want that to be a part of your relationship. And hey you might find that they like it too. Lotta people are pretty open-minded. Just don't make a big deal about it. If it isn't hurting anyone then who cares? If they reject you just for having a harmless kink then you just need to find someone that is on the same page and move on with them.

I think we need to quantify the difference between fetish and a sexual preference. A sexual preference just means you like something a lot, but it's not necessarily needed to get you aroused. A fetish means you literally can't achieve climax without it. Some people have some really crazy ones; like they need to set at least part of themselves on fire, or they have to be given electrical shocks, or there has to be sneezing (I'm not kidding, that's a real thing and there's even a forum dedicated to it). I sometimes have said in the past that I have a lot of fetishes, but in reality I just mean I have a bevy of sexual preferences. If I had an actual fetish, I would tell someone immediately up front, because there's just no getting around that. For general preferences, I might wait until we get intimate, or I may discuss it with them beforehand. It all depends on how close we are and how open I feel I can be with them. If I can't talk to them about it eventually, though (or they can't tell me theirs); it just isn't gonna' work.

I have dated people with pee fetishes. It didn't work out. Also, it the fet community, fetish is the same as sexual preference, which is why the sex list is necessary so that your partner understands the degree to which you require that fetish to be a part of your lovemaking. ALSO, it is interesting that sneezing got brought up because I have had more than one person tell me my sneezes were sexy and that they would pay for me to sneeze erotically for them. Same thing with hiccups. http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/wwhet.gif The world of sex is a colorful and vibrant one, indeed.

@kurosora, well she's not a socially insecure teen like half the people here. I'm probably a total slut by your guys standards but then I've been dating longer than many people here have been alive. @cinnamoon, I have a fetlife account btw. I'll post it later. Overall I'm fairly vanilla though but willing to experiment.