Gym Jerk.

lord wasn't using his bullied story as a defence for my dickishness, he was using it to attack the "just ignore it" comment. Also I should make mention the girl wasn't just sitting there with a cheery smile. She looked uncomfortable and like she just saw her childhood puppy run over by a truck. everything the guy was saying was digging into her. He was saying things like Dude1(foothurt): "look at that girl, I don't know why she is trying to lose the weight. a smaller pile of crap is still crap" Dude2: "nah man, the weight loss might be good but her tits are the first thing to go. D1: "shit, whats a girl without a nice rack. but I bet she has stretchmarks. skinny girls with stretchmarks are even worse than a fatty with them." Need I remind you. EVERYONE could hear them talking and this went on for a good 8-10 minutes!

No, I'm not kidding. I have personal experience in "fueling the fire" myself. That's why I ended up getting stabbed by a school gang. It's fine to stand up to a bully, but when you do that, you also need to not give them the attention they are seeking. I don't mean that by flat out pretending they aren't there. Also, I have been bullied my entire life. I still am. I live in an abusive situation at home with an abusive family that I am trying to get away from. In fact, right now, I can hear them yelling and screaming at each other, like they do every night. And tomorrow, it'll probably be directed at me in some form or another. Ususally emotionally or financially, but I have had scalding hot coffee thrown at me before. We'll have to wait and see. Also, I've been picked on my entire life for being short (I only stand at 5'4" currently, but at the age of ten I was only about 3 feet tall until I started taking growth hormone replacements.) That also brings me to the other thing I was bullied about; asthma. I had such severe asthma as a kid I was on so many medications that it stunted my growth, haha. But having asthma was a key role in why I was bullied. I was never healthy enough to be like "normal" people. Also, being nearsighted didn't help either. You know, ol' four eyes and all. I didn't really have friends who supported me until after I got out of High School, and I've only been in college for about five years...so that's not a long time to have many friends, haha. Don't claim that I've never been bullied or haven't experienced it. We all do. That's something that happens to most people over their lifespans. You don't know me, I don't know you. I'm just weighing an opinion based on your action and how she reacted. I don't know her, and I said it could possibly not be the reason, but I bet my bottom dollar that it's part of why she reacted the way she did. It's also probably a mixture of that with what you said, having to rely on herself. But at the same time, it seems to me that she was alone there? It usually takes somebody with a lot of courage to go out like that if they face a problem like that regularly. It seems to me she had the confidence to back up her statement. Low blow for comparing a sapient entity to cancer. Cancer is a disease, not a person you can respectfully tell off. Actually, I generally ask them first before anything. Communication is the key, in most situations. I often go out of my way to help people if they need help, but I never barge in on somebody else's business like if it's unwanted.

I think one of the main points of conflict is that was wasn't too detailed in my original story. In my mind I had the whole story on replay and all you guys have is Vague mean guys, I might have broken a dudes foot and they got kicked out and she throws everything back in my face. Everyone in that gym (floor plan wasn't very big, 24 hour fitness in a movie theatre stipmall. maybe 20 people if someone was pregnant.) was giving them disgusted and angry looks. Some were even talking to management, to kick them out I am guessing.

It does help to be as specific as possible in the story, haha. ;) --- On your behalf, and on your side, all you can really do is not beat yourself up about it and move on. You can't really help differing opinions on things, nor how people react to something. Somebody else might have been super impressed by your violence, who knows, haha? What's done is done, and all we can do is move on with our lives. And I would say that several people, including yourself, learned a lesson that day.

@takumi, I respectfully and sincerely apologize for doubting your level of experience in the realm of bullying. I also wholeheartedly give you my sympathy for the troubles and abuse you are still currently experiencing. I wish you the very best in all your ventures. The cancer thing was a "ignore something that wont go away unless forcefully removed or eradicated with poison." at least cancer doesn't lie about being cancer. I believe there are two types of bullies, those who are horrible people who like to cause pain and those who project their own trauma onto others because replicating the abuse onto others helps disociate the events in their memories and eases the pain by giving it to someone else. In my past, it was the latter. I make no excuses for what I did, and I already admitted it was from a place of hate as much as it was for that girl. It's not an excuse for what I did, just for how I have gone about this post and how I have messaged. I do have a mild strain of Aspergers, so organizing what I have in my head into a single linear thought structured enough to be translated into words clearly enough for other people to understand and carry my intentions and beliefs to others is not an easy task. especially when I get upset and say the first thing that pops in my head instead of thinking it out. So sorry for my posts and any misunderstandings or issues caused by things I have said. An ex still believes I am a Chronophile because I tried to explain that males are capable of being baby crazy and that I want daughters because beautiful and sweet little angels. What she got out of it was I am obsessed with little girls and I should be burnt at the stake. @Lord. Yes, the title refers to myself. At the time of posting it I thought that the two guys were somewhat peripheral and the girl a supporting role in a story told from my perspective giving me a first-person POV and that any stories title should match the focus point as closely as possible. You wouldn't name a story about wolves after a frog. It was either Gym Jerk, or, Gym Troubles. After all the curfuffle, Gym Jerk worked out for the best.

@sunbae. I can understand. Wanting to stand on your own two feet with your own strength, anyone helping you without you asking almost feels like they are taking a bit of the power from you. A lot of the time it is also a sense of invalidation that causes the reaction. "I can do it on my own" 'I know' "If you knew, you would let me do it on my own. Thank you for your help but I'm good" 'Alright. Call me if you need me.' -later on you feel like maybe you might need help, but the fact that you shunted them off earlier means you can't ask for help even more than before. Because if you ask for help, you validate their unasked for attempt to help you and encourage them to help without asking again, which causes you to do it more on your own and push away help even more because of your aggression you built up silently. Or maybe I am wrong. Basing things off of prideful friends, myself and an ex who had borderline personality disorder.