Any "Asexual" people here?

I'm asexual/graysexual. I am already taken but the type of person that I was looking for (not so much personality wise) is someone who I can "click" with. The kind of person who we can have a substantial conversation with about anything and have time we can be together and just not talk at all and both those situations are fine. Also, kind of like how ESPR says he thinks " a perfect couple consist of one "pushy" or "energetic" person and one quiet and relaxed/introvert person, " I find opposites attract. And I feel like me and my boyfriend are pretty different in our personalities: I am way more outgoing and talkative regardless of my interests with other people while he can be quite and introverted when being around people he doesn't have much common with. But we still respect each other and our qualities. Though, he does cheer me on when I try to loose weight.

So, instead of wanting to have sex for any reason, you choose not to have sex. Isn't that called abstinence? Or being a virgin? That's what's I thought anyways. All these "terms" and shit are really redundant to me but then again, I'm not asexual. I mean, if you're asexual, do you still masturbate? Why would anyone choose to be asexual? I'm sure there are good reasons like you've been raped or you have an STD or something, but outside of those 2 things, I cannot imagine why someone would choose to not have sex with anyone, ever.

Kichigai, People don't choose their sexuality, Or most don't. For instance, I'm straight, I'm only attracted to females, I only want sex with females, And I'm still a virgin, for moral reasons, not sexuality. Homosexuals only wants sex with people of the same sex, Okay? Well someone Asexual doesn't want or at least desire or are attracted to any sex. Get it? People can have sex and still be asexual, Even though I wouldn't understand why.

@Kichigai actually, a stereotype about asexual was that they are just people who can't get a partner and masturbate all the time or are sick. Asexual means they aren't sexual attracted to people, of either (or lack of) sex/gender because they just built that that way through environmental or genetic factors, or a combination of both. They can be romantically attracted to people, unless they are aromantic which is another story. Asexuals may certainly masturbate and have sex and many do. It is not a choice to be asexual (just like how being gay is not a choice). A few people who identify as asexual have been raped because they identify as asexual through what is called "corrective rape." But just to be clear, abstinence is a choice to stay away from sex, chastity is abstaining from sex cuz of religion (a choice) and asexuality is not a choice but an sexual orientation (or lack of one). http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/20/asexual-discrimination_n_3380551.html

Here is a nice read for any questions you have that answer in detail that sexuality about asexuals and being fluid, and how asexuals can have sex and how people identify as asexual. http://www.asexuality.org/home/general.html

And that's why I'm lost. I don't believe that people don't choose their sexuality. Or at least I don't believe everyone is born a certain way. By that I mean I do think some people experiment and try new things. But Sex is sex. You being a virgin is your choice. Now if you were to say that you've never had sex with a woman but you had sex with a guy and you're claiming to be straight, I'd virtually slap you. In my short time on this Earth, I've never heard of so many labels for the most ridiculous things. So, when do you become asexual? Is there a time limit or something? Is it like people who smoke or drink and they "quit" for years? do you become asexual and then stop? I'm straight. I never had sex with a man before nor do I plan on it. I've had multiple sex partners and have every intention on increasing that # till the day I die. Can someone who's asexual say the same thing about being asexual or is it a state of mind for the time being? Captcha : DGFaG

Hey, Rina, I just saw that you posted after I already made that post, gimme a minute to read it and I'll respond accordingly

Okay. yeah, it is weird. people can certainly change the sexuality. that's why I make a point of: "just built that that way through environmental or genetic factors, or a combination of both." I believe eveyone's sexuality is very fluid. I am not sure you can test out being asexual though. You can test out not having sex with you partner but that isn't the same. Like how you can have sex with different people of different genders or sexes but that isn't really the same as being straight or gay or bisexual. It is more like, well if you want a label, what are you more comfortable with? Also, I would like to point out I am not a virgin and participate in the activities when my boyfriend is near.

Pretty easily explained, an asexual doesn't "think" nor specifically "want" sex but they can have it if they want either pleasure or if they want a child, but an asexual would not do it out of "love" or because they want to. it's just the only way to go about doing it. and btw, asexuality is permanent if you REALLY are asexual, it's not if you just say you are for the lolz XD

I am still sticking with my fluid and spectrum sexuality idea! That's why I said I am ace/gray. And I really am not saying it for the "lolz."