Ugh Ugh Ugh

I know what zappandroger is talking about because I feel that now. I fell for some one and in my mind I made her to be someone she isn't . Since gave my self some space from her to clear my mind and decide if she really was what I wanted to fight for. I realize it was a delusion. Her true face was another. I remain her distant friend she comes to me for life advice. But there's nothing there for me to gain. She doesn't feel the same in my case. As a kind person I continue to listen and give advice. I cannot help it at this point because my heart and mind are at war half of the time and I am a kind person.

Thanks guys! Heres another update: 2 saturdays ago I just got home from work and I get a txt from him asking if I wanted to go to the movies with him and a couple of our friends. Now it was a bad day cuz I found out something kinda awful. So I told him no. He kept persisting that I should go and such and 10 mins later I was pulled in. After a while all of our friends bailed and so it was going to be just me and him. So he decided to cancel it. I talk with him every now and again, but yet i still do kinda miss him. And i think that movie thing was an excuse to see me. Also this summer I might be going to Japan for a scholarship program. I told him about this and it seemed as if he didnt take the news quite well. I think that he still does care for me. Jst im not so sure :/

Ikr? Jst this weekend I went to my homecoming dance with this rly nice guy. But I saw all the other couples and it made me think of my ex and how badly I wanted to get out of there. My friend who was with us kept persisting on my date and I to spend some alone time with eachother. But hey, it was a while since i've gone out with a guy and I was nervous as hell! I seriously didn't want to be left alone with my date. But the day b4 the dance was the football game. My best friend was bragging to my ex on such a good time i was having without him and that i was "with another guy". He kinda changed the subject on her and instantly went to bed. My bff said that she could feel that he was jealous. Sigh...idk wat to do anymore....And I', srsly not taking the "u have to move on" advice bc that isnt me.

With all due respect, all you can do is move on or go back to him. All there is in the middle is pain. Not only for yourself, but your ex and any other guy you date unless you make a choice. No one can decided these things for you, only you can. Indecision will ruin your life and make you miss valuable opportunities. Will you hurt peoples feeings? Yes. Will you get hurt? Yes. It's all part of living life. Make a choice, stick with it, and see where it takes you. I wish the world was a place where people didn't have to make such hard choices, but wishing only gets you so far. I hope that you can find your happiness.