Anxiety and Fear

How do you personally cope or conquer anxiety and/or fear especially when it comes to meeting new people whether it's for making friends or establishing relationships? I cope with it and hope for the best and not make a fool of myself. It's exhausting being in a conversation sometimes.

For anxiety/fear in meeting people. I have very little anxiety about meeting people. Generally I enjoy socializing, so it comes easily for me. However, things to do with say... talking to a guy and having him suddenly not talk to me. I won't act like it is stressing me out, but it most certainly does. I am high-strung I suppose. I like to make sure the other person is happy. I want to keep their interest. So, I try to make an effort to keep a conversation going. I think that because I worry about whether I am boring etc. people think that maybe I am more concerned than I actually am. Anyway. If you are making an effort to get to know someone, you shouldn't try to make a fool of yourself, yet you should be genuine, be yourself. If someone wants to get to know you, they will also want to know how you're like, and all your little quirks. If they are right for you, they will accept them, and maybe even find them endearing.

I don't try to make a fool out of myself I just feel like I am somehow. I'm never entirely sure of what to say or do. Maybe I worry too much about it or think too much before doing anything really. I think what I'm afraid of most is offending someone.

Honestly, that's how I feel often. People are different. Something that works for one person doesn't necessarily work for the other. I too overthink to the point that it causes me more stress and anxiety than anything. If you are being genuine and the other person is a reasonable human being, then they shouldn't be offended. Also, while I can tell you don't go out of your way to make a fool of yourself, and most people don't... you'd be surprised how many do. They think that it will help them fit in better... I guess? Anyway, that doesn't seem like you as far as I can tell.

i understand how hard it can be when you feel like that ill admit im usually pritty good with meeting and talking to people but i think the reason why is a little trick i learned when i was little and had to move from place to place a lot. before you go up take three deep breaths to clear your mind. relax your body and think of it like a game. these people are just an adventure and they are just waiting to be your friends only their to shy to talk to YOU. if you think more about the type of fun stuff you COULD be doing together when your getting to know them then you wont feel as awkward or nervous. and if they're not very nice well ...did you really want a friend that could treat a stranger like that any way? people who are rude and nasty to some one they don't know ,usually shows exactly how they will treat you when all's said and done if they become your friend.

I used to fear social situations like the plague when I was little. Conquering your fears requires small doses of exposure over a long length of time. Start off with relationships that are impersonal. Make small talk with strangers, expect no friendships or even replies. "Hi, good day to you." No attachment to the outcome. Just practice the art of starting conversation. It gets easier with practice, and when there are real stakes to the relationship, say a job interview or a date with a crush, then it's not as frightening since you've had so much experience with conversations that got nowhere. The fearful hypothetical rejection becomes manageable once you've built an immunity or tolerance to it.

Well Knightshine, I understand where you're coming from. I was a bit like that back in my youth. I always find it best to be yourself and not someone you're not. I think for some anxiety comes from the fear of not being liked. Now, I'm not trying to be mean here but hopefully you can understand that everyone in the whole world do not have to like you; or will like you. Even for reasons beyond rationale. Same thing for me as for my media production endeavors; I can't please everyone. However if you have one thing that the other person likes about you then play on that; nurture it. You might have to go beyond your comfort zone. The more you feel good and/or confident about yourself can really help you out. I do have my moments when I want to be alone and anti-social but as do most people I do yearn for interaction. I find a healthy outlet for it like on M.O. (here) for example or at a convention. I actually like talking to random people while in line (waiting for something), asking about one's cosplay, say something/comment on a cosplayer I happen to take a picture of. This past Anime Matsuri 2014 I striked up a conversation with a random otaku while in line for an autograph session. He had a Holo laptop bag (Holo from Spice and Wolf; which I adore) and commented about how I liked his bag. We started talking about who we were in line for, what we wanted to get autographed. Turned out he was a phuckin' jerk but phuck him; who cares? I was comfortable at least get to know a little bit about the otaku next to me. He hated the fact I don't care about Full Metal Alchemist and rather the only Full Metal I'm interested in is Full Metal Panic. But that didn't stop me from trying again, while in line for a concert I met a nice Inuyasha cosplayer. Me and my buddy both had Rumiko Takahashi related anime shirts on. We both starting talking to her and it was really fun'; we enjoyed ourselves. Teased her a little she didn't know what anime series were on our shirts since she is a Rumiko Takahashi fan. My buddy was wearing an Urusei Yatsura and I was wearing a Maison Ikkoku one. She can tell they were Takahashi designs but was unfamiliar about it. Not surprising though since we were from an older generation of anime otaku(s). Plus it's always fun for me to have them guess how old I am. Everyone seems to think I'm barely 20. My friend also looks young and not his age. Whoopsie, went WAY off topic. But year Knightshine, you just need to keep trying and get comfortable about meeting and talking to someone new.

I tend to have a little bit of fear and/or anxiety when meeting new people, but its purely because of some speech trouble I have. Im actually a fairly confident person, but Im stuck worrying about the impression my speech may make. If it werent for that, Im one that would be able to easily speak my mind or interject myself into conversations. So its not really a fear of other people, being judged for looks, or whatever. I just have to worry about how I talk. Ive been working on it, and if I ever manage to overcome it entirely there wont be much holding me back.

I never have anxiety from meeting new people. If anything, I am too open. However, I have panic attacks at times, but that is caused by a chemical imbalance and I take meds for it.