Cynicism and Relationships?

I don't know if it's just me, but I have a very pessimistic look on relationships. To make a long story very short; too much drama and too much nonsense with bad partners may have soured my perspective on romantic partnership. For me, it takes a long time for me to trust anybody and even longer to develop feelings for someone. I always expect my partner to stab me in the back, betray what trust I invest in them or just abandon me flat out. I have the thinking that if I'm not too attached when they do it I'm not too terribly worse for ware. My question to the forum for this evening is do you think that pessimism and cynicism towards a potential partner is a bad thing, and if it is; how would you improve your standing to "relax" around a potential partner?

Just relax, keep calm and a steady mind. If you think about a worst case scenario, you making it fail before giving it a chance.

But then that also raises the question of, how should I relax? Do I just tell myself that this time it'll be different? Or do I just try and convince myself that not all experiences will be bad, despite the fact I'm more aligned to believe the contrary?

I might sound like a know it all smartass. but i got the solution for you Kenshinjmc. You almost already got the hang of it, the trick is to use pessimism to your advantage. Say you start a new relationship tomorrow, you in your pessimism decides it wont last a week, good, convince yourself of this! Once a week pass and you happen to be wrong, you can allow yourself to be pleasently surprised and appreciate the fleeting moments of happiness we all chase. Now take it to the extreme, convince yourself that she would stab you in your sleep, now you get to wake up every morning being all happy your not bleeding all over the place fighting off a psycho-lady. This have worked excellently for me through a series of years, but I would not recommend it for every aspect of your life as it burns you out after a while... Odds are the relationship will go sour before you feel the burnout, so you can safely take a break before the drawbacks gets too overwhelming. Drawbacks include, but are not limited to: Increased cynicism, Apathic attitude, indifference, and in extreme cases Malice against all living things...