Neko-chi™

I can't deal its so hard o early let tears out but they been rolling out for 3 days straight now whys it so hard I can't stop loving her or hurting its torturing mw

Although loosing her as my girlfriend hurt immensely and having no one as my girlfriend sucks I now realize that's not what has been hurting so much and upon this realization know that nobody can help me with this not even suicide prevention I spent an hour having emotional break down over this too my issue and why I'm depressed n why I have no confidence and had no confidence with and without and also why I needed u so much ....I didn't n don't need you to be my gf I needed your caring and support and I don't mean just the I hope your ok and everything will be ok I need care and support because just now I realized my life is an endless loosing battle and getting sick of I'm tired of fighting for a girl and loosing I'm tired of fighting for my job and as of now loosing I'm tired of fighting for some of the things I want and loosing and I sick of fighting for my happiness and every single time no matter what I'm fighting for ano matter how much strength courage and effort I show n put into every battle I loose and the battle for hervheart just hit me real hard because that was the one time I had true confidence in myself that I would win and it'd be ok and I lost and that's why I can't have confidence it hurts less having no confidence and loosing because you see it coming and that's why I can't nor could I ever be confident low self-esteem and depression are my coping mechanisms like your numbness if I don't think things will be ok and they aren't I is much easier then being confident and getting shot down all the time so loosing her isnt why I'm depressed and hurting its loosing in general and no suicide prevention line or anything like thst can stop someone from loosing all the time

Yay, ok! We will go to the zoo, make friends on the way and travel to Japan, China, Europe, everywhere! http://s3.sidereel.com/cms/posts/220120/large/polar-bears-cafe-episode-2.jpg

Its not the girl its the pain I can't deal with n no job means no life either n if I'm such a great guy why am I never a first choice