why is it so hard to meet some one

Yeah, sounds like a legit plan. I don't see anything wrong with it. Beside the charming part, that you have learn yourself

charm is subjective so theres mutiple ways of being charming. However, On its most fundamental level people agree its the ability to make playful banter and witty comments which are just more subtle ways of showing intelligence. Being able to do this keeps a person's attention, entertains and engages them all at the same time. Intelligence is a survival tool so according to evolutionary psychology its naturally very sexy if shown the right way. If he/she still dosn't fancy you after that then you arnt compatible on some other level or they dont like something else about you. Which is why we have to put in effort to cover all our bases. Lets not be naive that means appearances, well roundedness/worldliness, being compassionate and understanding etc. Learning and doing all that takes effort but I hope that spelled it out for you all. Good luck.

good luck. there are enough new users it seems but some of them are on hiatus half of the time. even if you ARE active, commenting and posting in the forums, you're not guaranteed anything either.

As I've stated in other threads, unless you live in relatively populous states (TX, CA, NY, FL, etc.) your chances of finding a lot of active users in your area are going to be pretty small. The site is actually semi-active but most of the active users are so spread out. Unless you don't mind an LDR, then the best you're probably going to do on here is find a lot of online friends.