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Missouri/School I remember when the day I was expelled. Snapping back to reality I went and talked to my History Teacher Mr. Branson. Out of every Teacher he is still my favorite. He helped me to defend myself without getting in trouble, keeping my grades up, and studying frequently until I let my grades drop, skipped school, and smoked Pot often. When I was Expelled I went to see him later in the day. I had a Breakdown and kind of walked around in a trance in town for a few hours. Once I got my head together I wrote a note to him. I told him about my life, as I'm telling you now. I explained everything I was going through and why I kept things to myself. I told him I smoked Pot and I left the note on his desk. It was a page and a half long on a yellow piece of notebook paper. He decided to keep it in picture frame and he talked with the school and demanded I be unexpelled. Well finally they changed their minds, I got back in school, and then I decided I could do whatever I wanted with my life. So I moved in with Relatives in Michigan to get a head start on my future and run away from my problems. In the end I've always ran from my problems instead of dealing with them, and I know I do that too which makes it worse. Back in Michigan It had been many years since I had been in Michigan for more than a week. I moved to East Lansing, went to Highschool, got a Fast Food cooking job, and still kept to myself quite a bit.

Chatango Chatango I had met two wonderful Women. One was Allie, she was a Punk/Rock girl in Montrael who spoke German, French, Chinese, and English. Her and I actually fell in love. But after a while when we'd text or talk it turned sexual. I felt somehow I'd changed her so I ended things with her and stopped talking with her. I didn't want to ruin someone elses life so I took a step back. MAIOTAKU (This is about a year after I joined, and I started talking to a girl I had asked out for Coffee in a Message on here.) She actually likes Cold Fraps lol, funny how I remember that >.< I fell in love with a girl on Maiotaku a couple years ago. Her and I texted everyday, met at Cons, and had a date. Before we even met, because I had such strong feelings for her that I quit Smoking Cigarettes, Smoking Pot (Dealing with Shitty Headaches to be more likable and less looking like an Idiot.), I stopped hanging out with friends and began studying to get into a better School. Well I got rejected, started those things up again and went into a depression. I remember trying to say Hi to her at a Con after she broke my heart and then I'd act like I was cold and say something like "I'd love to stay and talk more, but my friends are waiting." Well instead she said word for word what I was going to say and just left. So later that night I hit the bar and got wasted and drunk texted her and made myself look like an ass. (I had been planning on "running" into her at a Panel and asking her out for Coffee but I never got the chance...lol.) I also bought my Howl Cosplay to please her lol, Ironic that I was wearing it when I basically got turned down in the end.

During this time alone I got back on Chatango and met a girl who lived 4 miles away. Her name was Nina... I've seriously tried writing this paragraph for the last hour and I just ended up deleting it over and over and rewriting it. Nina... I loved her very much. We met in person very rarely but each time we really enjoyed it... On multiple occasions I tried to ask her out and she'd always refuse and change the subject. Half a year ago I got on Skype and messaged her when I saw she was online. It wasn't her. It was her Sister. She explained to me that Nina passed away the prior week in Open Heart Surgery. I didn't cry. I didn't do anything. I simply was just shocked. A little later on when she asked more about me (Since she hadn't really known me.) When I told her she replied that the "Corey", Nina wrote about in her Diary, she liked very much. Nina had told her Family and anyone I knew to keep her condition a secret from me. So a year of talking to her I had no idea she as slowly getting ill. Basically she wanted to keep me away from the pain of being attached to her and watching her die. I loved Nina, and I never once got the chance to tell her that, or how I really felt. Even now I wonder what would have happened if I'd have been a little aggressive, less shy? Maybe told her how I really felt things might have been different.

I'm not trying to attack anybody on here but I see people complaining about small problems with their "Ex's" that they dated for two weeks-a few months. I've been reading the Forums for quite a while now and I just haven't bothered to make a notable post to yet. I just don't think many people on here have the right to complain as much as they do. Because of the things I've done and I take responsibility for I don't have that right either. I'm just sharing some main things that had happened in my life and this is only half of them. But if your Ex left you for another guy after dating them online for a short while, and not seeing them in real life much. I've had my Girlfriend (Pretty much Fiance) leave me for who I thought was my best friend. I've pushed a girl away because I felt I was a negative influence on her, and the entire time I was thinking of her well being. Talked to a girl Online for a long period and actually changed yourself majorly for the better so they'd smile at you. Or had the girl you were last in love with lie that she was dying and push you away in the end so you wouldn't be hurt, which I was.

After all of this I've finished Highschool, Got a Grant to Attend the College of my choice (With Aid to transfer to a University), Study on a regular basis, and dropped my dead beat "acquaintances" I had called my friends, and move towards a better future. What I'm getting at is that don't complain so much and look at what you have now. Also on a side note it took 6 hours of straight typing to write this entire message. It was way too long to post in one message so I had to put it into sections.