How to convince myself to end it all

I got lucky, my insurance covered everything. It sucks that you have to choose between getting help or getting screwed by having a huge bill a d mental health issues.

Well, talking is a good step, though. I'm guessing you've already gone the medical route as far as medication? Talked to your GP?

Well, I can tell you this, going to am online forum will probably get you no good answers. Sure, it's absolutely good to talk and get things out, but I wouldn't expect an answer here and not to mention it's WAY above what anyone here can truly answer. Again, that's not to discourage you from talking to people. If you do feel like you can't handle things, having debt and being alive is better than the other option.