Maiotaku members fanfiction

(Bade Billson Scene) :3 Bade Billson's Apartment) (Bathroom Scene) (Bade is singing in the shower) "Pickles and beans, pickles and beans, oh how I love you pickles and beans" (Gunshots heard outside bathroom window) "Dammit" (Bade opens window to yell, and he has a gasmask on???) "Keep it down, I'm trying to enjoy some me time up here. Huh?" (Bade sees a group of teens trying to rob a young boy) (Boys dialogue) "Give me your money kid, I ain't asking twice" "I dont have any I swear" *teen grabs boy by the collar* "Quit lying, hand over the god damn money" *Bade shows up behind the group and yells* HEY!!!! *Bade is in his underwear and gasmask? Great* "What the hell are you guys doing that I had to rush out here in my skivvies huh?!" *teens start laughing at him mockingly* "Oh yeah sure, let's all get a good laugh from the gas mask man in his underpants" *Main teen drops the boy and yells at bade* "Get back in your hole gaybo" *the name angers bade* *bade walks slowly to the teen picking his ear with his other hand to his side* "Um please forgive me sir, I believe I did not here you correctly, would you be so kind as to repeat your sentence please?" *teen gets in bade's face* "I said, get back in your damn house gaybo!" *Bade puts his hand to his chin* "Oh there it is I hear it now, very well lad I shall leave but, before I depart, may I ask one question? " WHAT!" *Bade points to his head with a confused look* "Why is there a hammer connected to your cranium sir" "What?" *All of a sudden, a mallet hammer falls from the bade's window and smacks the teen's head, knocking him out, teens get frightened and boy is just watching startled* *Bade picks up the hammer and looks at the other teens* "So, who wants to play whack a mole?" *teens run off, leaving thier friend behind* *Bade throws his arms up* "Ahh man, the party just started, ah well" *Bade goes over to the boy and helps him up* "You OK kid?" *boy begins to speak* "Yeah, thanks *boy looks closer at Bade and recognizes him* "Hey, aren't you Bade Billson?!" *Bade grabs a peice of gas from the ground and looks at his reflection* "Why yes, yes I am" *boy becomes excited* "Oh man Mr. Billson this so cool, please can I get an autograph"! *Bade becomes happy and agrees* "Ha-ha, why certainly young man" *Bade gets a pen from somewhere?* *He starts searching for something to sign, until he notices something behind the boys back* "Hey, watch'a got there?" *boy becomes embarrassed* "It's nothing Mr. Billson, its just junk" "Junk? That looks like a hammer? C'mon let me see" *boy becomes more embarrassed* "It's really nothing special Mr. Billson, its nothing you'd be proud of" *Bade bends down a little* "Ah c'mon on sport, if it's a hammer I love it, c'mon let me see" *boy relents and shows Bade his hammer he made* *the hammer is nothing more than a stick, with cloth around it, with a tin can as the hammer part, with a rock wedged into one side* "Told you it was nothing special" *Bade takes the hammer and holds it* "Are you kidding me? This is awesome, this is expert street engineering right here" *boy becomes surprised* "But the handles is broken, and hammer part is barely holding on" *Bade swings the hammer and the handles breaks in his hands* "Ah man, your right in that note. *Bade looks at the boy* "Well, as for me not to look like some gay weirdo, I'll make ya a deal. Let me throw some clothes on, and I'll help ya fix up your hammer here to the point of super awesome? Sound good?" *boy becomes excited* "Really you mean it" "Sure thing sport, be right back" *Bade runs back inside* *15 minutes later* *Bade appears back outside in his full bounty hunter suit, made of a black sleeveless shirt, brown battle pants, some holsters, and two hammers on his back. He's also, holding a chest of tools* *boy looks a Bade in his true glory* "This is so cool"! *Bade slams his tool chest in on a trash can* "You ain't seen nothign yet son, ha-ha" *Bade gestures for the boy to join him* "Now get over here, and lets make this bad boy" *Bade and the boy start rebuilding the boys hammer into what Bade describes as "the description of awesome* *boy is now holding his new hammer, that now has a reinforced steel handle with a cloth grip, a stone for the hammer head, and a B symbol on one side of the head, which is the boys autograph* "watcha think sport"? *boy is super excited, swinging the hammer left and right* " This is awesome, thanks so much Mr. Billson"! *Bade is happy and ruffles the boys hair* "Anytime kid, now remember, if those punks cone at ya, give the old one two with old besty her got it" *boy laughs and salutes to Bade* "Yes sir" *Bade plays along and salutes back* "Then go young cadet, may the hammer be with you" *boy runs off, waving goodbye to Bade* *Bade turns around, with his hands behind his head, walking back to his apartment* "You did good Billson, ya did," *Bade trips over something* "Ooomh", what the hell!" *Bade then notices he triped over the teen he knocked out earlier* "Whoops" *Bade gets up and looks at the teen, pandering what to do* *Bade then looks left and right quickly, picks up the teen, throws him on top of a dumpster, and runs backside his apartment* *Bade gets inside then slams the door breathing heavily* * Bade begins walking toward the bathroom again* "I'm sure he'll wake up soon, its only 10:00, if he doesn't the trash will get him, ha-ha. Get him, that's a good one" *Bade gets back in shower and starts singing again* "Now where was I, oh yeah. Pickles and beans, pickles and beans. (END)

(Bade Billson Issue) Damn, morning already *bade gets up and stretches* "Wonder what fun I'll get to have today, provided the guy behind the scenes doesn't screw me over" *bade goes to his fridge* "Hmm let's see, soda?, jello?, whiskey? How bout all three! *bade grabs the contents of his fridge and puts them in a blender* *bade then drinks his " concoction"* "Ahh, fruity, smooth, and I makes me want to vomit, what a drink". *suddenly there's a knock at the door* Oh maybe my back scratcher finally came *bade opens the door to see a delivery man in a dress???* " Want to take me to the prom" "Huh?" "I said, I need to sign for this, you are Bade Billson aren't you?" "Yep, unless someone lost the copyright" "What?" "Nothing" *bade signs for the package and waves goodbye* *bade walks inside and sits down in the couch* "C'mon back scratcher, come to papa. Wait a minute, is there a clock in here??? *Bade then looks a the note attached that reads* *SURPRISE DARLING* OH CRAP!!! *bade throws the package and jumps out his window as the package explodes* *bade crawls out of the dumpster he landed in* "Great just great, now not only am I homeless, but, now I smell like yesterday's leftovers. Plus, my back scratcher got destroyed in the explosion. *bade then yells the next sentence* "ALONG WITH MY HAMMERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "Luckily, I know the one responsible!" *bade then runs to one that is responsible* (2 Hours later) *bade shows up to a high rise club* "So, this is wear you hang out, how like you" *bade starts to think* "I must use my expert stealth skills to get in there without being detected". "Let's see, doors open, but guarded. Windows? No, fun but too much noise. Bingo air vent, I'm so smart. *bade then strangely, sneaks to a air vent on the side of the building*. *bade gets into the air vent* " eh ow c'mon Billson, man I knew I should've gone running this morning, O wait I couldn't, my apartment blew up!" *below a air duct are two guards* "You hear something?" "What, besides music and half dressed girls screaming, no I don't" "Bade then falls out of the air duct becuase it breaks" "What the!!" "Ouch, they don't make those like they used too" "Oh, guys with guns". *bade throws his hands up and " talks " with his opponents* "Why hello there, could you kind gentleman tell me where to find the mistress of this her castle?" "Shut up freak" *goons point guns at bade* "Oh I see, that's OK I'll find her myself, by the way, there's a bomb behind you" *guards look behind then* "What?!" *bade takes the advantage and knocks out the guards* "Hahahaha hahaha. O man I can't believe you fell for that. " Now, onward" *bade then heads down the hallway* "Now if I were a head headdress where would I spend my time, in the penthouse of course. Better find the elevators" *bade find the elevators and pushes button* "Going up" *door opens and then men with guns are inside* *bade jumps aside and hits the down button as bullets fly* "SSSSSSSHHHHHHHIIIIITTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!" *goons are able to get out* *bade proceeds to fight them* "Stop jumping around freak"! "Stop shooting, were killing eachother!" *bade stops dodgeing and punching and there's only two left* *bade picks up two shotguns* "These could cause some damage" *bade then turns the guns around and uses them as clubs on the guards* "BY I LIKE TO BE PHYSICAL BETTER" *all guards are down dead or defeated* *bade pushes the up button again* "Ok, now going up" *door opens and there's a bomb* "Oh come on"!!! *bade runs away from the door as it explodes* "Ok mistress, I shall take the stairs" *bade finds the stairs and looks up as there are quite a few* "Oh f*** me" *bade proceeds to climb the many stairs and eventually reaches the penthouse floor* "FINALLY"! *bade stretches a little and looks at himself in a hallway mirror* "Ok, look presentable". *bade then walks to the penthouse door and kicks it open with his shotguns drawn* "LET ME SEE THEM HANDS" *there's no one inside expect a woman in a white dress with red hair at the bar drinking a glass of wine* "I was wondering when you'd get passed my security" "Well well, lady Bishop, your jugs are as big as ever I see". "And your the one who tried to roast me this morning" "Correct, on both counts. You've been a thorn in my side for far too long Mr Billson" *bade walks toward her with a shotgun still drawn* "If you hadn't tried to kill me, I could've been a pain in your other places too". "Charming" *lady Bishop walks over to him and puts a hand on his chest* "I must say, you are quite impressive, I'm having to constantly remind myself tour a menace and not a toy". " Same here you gorgeous vixen, BUT" *Bade then foot sweeps her and pins her to the ground* "You tried to kill me, and you blew up my hammers, plus you made me smell like garbage, very smelly garbage." "Are you going to kill me Mr. Billson?" "I'm. Umm. Well. I don't yet, I'm thinking about what punishment is right for you. *lady Bishop laughs and turns bade over now she's on top of him* "Well while you think of that, I've decided what I'll do with you." *bade begins to talk in his mind* (" guess this is it, I don't know whether to be scared or turned on, or both") *lady Bishop starts undoing her dress* "Whoa umm-- *bade is cut off my Bishop kissing him (Ok time skip, I don't do sex scenes but, I'm sure you can figure out what happened) (1 hour later) *both bade and Bishop are in her bed* "I've reaches my decision" "And what is that hunter" "I'm not going to kill you, becuase, I think I've broken my number one rule" *Bishop throws here arms around him* "And what rule is that?" "Becoming attached" "I have a similar rule but, I believe I'm going to break it". *bishop then kisses bade, then bade asks* "Sooo, I kinda don't have a place to stay" *bishop just laughs* "You do now darling" ("Man, this has been a weird day, but, I'm lovin it") ("Thank you writer") The End Authors note So yeah, lady tries to kill bade, bade tries to kill her, they end up in bed, decide not to kill eachother, nos bade has a woman in his life that will make him a little more sane. Crazy yes. But Bade's crazy, so it works.

This thread is gone, what a shame. http://www.fandompost.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/OrderRabbit2b.jpg