Corruption

Granted - No butter/seasoning or drink to wash it down I wish I knew everything

Granted but your human brain could not handle so much information so you went insane. I wish I was omnipresent.

>went insane >assuming I'm not insane now you're so sweet

Granted but you found out that your mother is having an affair with your best friend! I wish the Tsuchinoko is not an UMA.

Kichigai, I thought the same thing too. Granted, (Don't know who Tsuchinoko is) but turns out Tsuchinoko is the most deadliest UMA and now hunting you. I wish for a teleportation portal to let us go to any existing planets with life in it.

Granted but a your genes got fused with a fly's. I wish cockroaches were cute.

Granted, but they're cute flesh-eating cockroaches. I wish every school was like Hogwartz (I think I spelled it right).